


celebrate living as long as you're breathing

by simply_aly



Series: we will still be there when the war is over [6]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Drabble Collection, F/M, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-25
Updated: 2016-12-19
Packaged: 2018-02-06 04:15:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 2,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1844044
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/simply_aly/pseuds/simply_aly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>#20: Clarke doesn't make it. This is the after. (Clarke/Clexa)</p><p>A collection of (generally) unrelated drabbles requested on Tumblr (the miscellaneous characters & 'ships version - listed in the chapter titles).</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Freedom (Octavia)

**Author's Note:**

> Octavia ponders what Earth means to her.

She loves the feeling of grass in between her toes, she loves the feel of water all around her. She loves standing in the sun, breathing the air.

She loves being free, and to her, Earth means freedom.

(It also means danger and death and uncertainty, but she tries not to think to much on that.)

Sometimes she looks up at the sky, the brilliant sky she had once only dreamed of seeing, and she thinks about the Ark—where it is up there, if anyone’s even alive. It’s then that she realizes how thankful she is to be here, despite the danger, because Earth is where she found herself; it’s where she became who she was always meant to be.

 


	2. Butterflies (Bellamy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy goes to the butterfly field.

Octavia thinks they’re the most beautiful thing on Earth, Miller thinks they’re stupid, and Clarke wonders about the implications of them scientifically. Bellamy…well, he just finds them peaceful.

He goes to the butterfly field sometimes when he’s not on watch or directing the camp and he sits among them. At first, he had been nervous—what if they wouldn’t fly near him like they did Octavia? what if they avoided him?—but then the tiniest one he could see landed on his nose. It tickled and instinctively he wanted to swat it off, but he couldn’t; he just let it sit there as it pleased until it flew away to join the rest.

After that first time, that same tiny butterfly would always greet him when he’d come, and it was that little glowing butterfly that convinced him that, perhaps, he wasn’t a horrible person—because he couldn’t fathom why such a delicate creature would go near a monster.


	3. Mourning (Ensemble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Octavia dying + reactions of Bellamy, Jasper, Monty and Lincoln.
> 
> (Character Death Warning)

Clarke’s face is pale and somber when she comes out of the dropship. Her bloody hands are shaking as she wrestles with control of herself; she doesn’t even have to say it—doesn’t know if she even could—and instead simply shakes her head.

Bellamy is the first to react, rushing into the dropship to sit beside her, holding her lifeless hand in his; “I’m sorry,” he whispers, “I failed you.”

Jasper goes directly to Clarke, he wants to be with Octavia as well, but he knows that now isn’t the time, and seeks comfort from Clarke, who wraps her arms around him as they both sob.

Monty closes his eyes, remembering the brave girl who had loved everything and fought for all of them with all that she had, he walks off to be alone, taking shelter behind a large tree—Raven will find him later, lean her head against his shoulder, but neither will speak.

Lincoln’s world stops when Octavia’s heart stops; his feet are no longer capable of holding him up, and he sits on the edge of the dropship’s door for hours, not taking in anything, not caring what happens next.


	4. Routine (Bellamy/Octavia)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blake siblings lifestyle on the Ark

Bellamy hardly sleeps, while Octavia does little else. Bellamy lives on half-rations and so does Octavia.

She always wishes to leave their family’s little room (and her even littler crawl space) and see everything, while he wants nothing more than to spend his days in that little room with Octavia, keeping her safe.

Octavia spends her days making up stories in her head, creating a world for herself to enter, which she shares with Bellamy when he returns home at night. Bellamy spends his days searching for small, new things to bring home to show Octavia to make her feel like she’s part of something bigger than those four walls.

Bellamy sits next to her crawl space talking softly to her until she falls asleep.

 


	5. Rescue (Clarke/Murphy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Murphy saves her from the Mountain Men.

He was the last person she expected to open her quarantine door and escort her out of Mount Weather. And, perhaps, if she had known it was him, if he hadn’t been dressed like the Mountain Men, she would have been a little more credulous (as it was, that came later). Instead, Clarke had just given in and walked with the supposed Mountain Man down different corridors until she ended up outside.

"Why?" she asked much later, when things have calmed down, as they sat opposite each other around a small fire in the woods.

Murphy shrugged, “Learned by chance that you were probably in there and I kinda figured you are my only chance at building a life out here somehow.”

Clarke didn’t know what to make of that, but she was glad to be out of there (how she was going to get everyone else out was a problem for tomorrow).

 


	6. Birthdays (Bellamy/Octavia)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Musings on the subject of birthdays.

Bellamy never really got much for his birthdays; he wanted it this way so Octavia wouldn’t feel so bad when hers came around. He always tried to make hers special—he’d find a treat for her, or he’d save up to buy her a real gift.

He knew it was never enough, but it was all he could do.

Octavia never minded, she was just glad that they celebrated her birth at all. It was the one day each year where they didn’t all seem to silently regret her existence.

She wanted nothing more than that, but it only happened once a year.

 


	7. Survival (Anya)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit of Anya's thoughts into the events of this season.

Anya’s people have been struggling to survive for years now. They’ve had to fight for everything they own. (Every battle they lose people, every fight costing them more than they gained.)

Then these young foreigners fall from the sky and try to take everything that’s hers? She won’t have it; if it’s war they want, that’s what they’ll get.

She fears what this will mean for her people; they’ll probably lose whatever the outcome.

 


	8. Sick (Ensemble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Octavia being sick as well was Bellamy + reactions of others.

Clarke begins her recovery just as Octavia falls ill, which is good, because no one wants to leave Murphy in charge of the sick people by himself.

Jasper watches out for Octavia until he has to leave with Finn (he _really_ doesn’t trust Murphy), and he finds himself looking behind his shoulder all the way back to the bridge.

Monty stops by for a moment, just to make sure she’s okay—well, as okay as she can be, considering the circumstances—then he’s gone, “to rescue Jasper” he whispers to Octavia.

Bellamy holds Octavia’s hand as she sleeps and, later, holds back her hair when she coughs up blood.

Murphy eyes Octavia’s sleeping form contemplatively—she’d be an easy route for revenge.

"So much for being immune," Octavia comments to Lincoln much later, after she recovers; he just sighs as he looks at the ground guiltily (he could have lost her).

 


	9. Save (Bellamy/Finn)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn saves Bellamy from an attack, Bellamy thanks him. The first step of them being good friends.

Finn guides an injured Bellamy to one of the caves. They run as far as they can then Finn leaves Bellamy and fights off the few Grounders who followed them. (He’s counting the seconds until blastoff.)

Later, when they know everything outside is burning, Finn holds pressure to Bellamy’s wound until the bleeding stops; he then cleans it as best he can with a piece of his shirt and the little water trickling from the cave wall.

(Bellamy honestly meant to say thank you after they left the cave, but no words followed that sight.)

 


	10. Alliance (Ensemble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone finds out Anya isn't as bad as they thought.

Finn’s the first to put the pieces together, but it’s Octavia who vocalizes his thoughts. “We invaded their land, Bellamy; we _burned_ one of their cities, and you guys _tortured_ Lincoln. Did you really expect them to treat us like allies?”

The second time peace talks take place, Octavia is sent as an envoy, and she reports back to the group assembled in the drop ship. “Anya will agree to let us remain on her land provided we stop killing her people—they’re dying out you know, with the radiation and everything, this generation is the first since the cataclysm where things have been looking up; she just wants to hold on to that.”

An alliance is formed, and Bellamy and Clarke begin to have regular contact with Anya and her advisers. They start to learn about Earth’s mysteries, and with each revelation, they almost begin to feel guilty for being sent to the ground at all—these people are struggling to win a war as it is, (and now they’ve involved themselves as allies).

 


	11. Council (Bellamy/Finn)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the rescue mission, the 100 notice that Finn and Bellamy became friends.

The 100 are well aware of the moment their two leaders enact a council that mimics the Ark’s—they told everyone that outright. Preceding that, however, they’re not sure when, exactly Bellamy and Finn began to get along.

It’s common speculation that it happened while they were alone together and planning the inevitable rescue of the 100 from Mt. Weather, but no one’s been brave enough to ask, so it remains rumor.

All anyone knows for certain is that after they got back to camp after their time at Mt. Weather, Bellamy and Clarke started making decisions with Finn as well. And soon after, Octavia and Raven and Jasper and Monty and Miller.

(They’re hedging bets on how long it’s going to take before they’re all just part of this council.)


	12. Laughter (Bellamy/Finn)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy continues to tease Finn after seeing him having sex with Clarke.

Clarke and Finn come back to camp in the middle of dinner and Bellamy can’t help but smirk. Between Clarke’s messier-than-normal hair and Finn’s contented expression, there is no question what they’ve gotten up to in the woods.

Bellamy lightly kicks Finn’s leg as he passes, and Finn looks at him in alarm—his senses haven’t fully recovered yet, Bellamy thinks. “Have a good hike?” he asks aloud, repeating their excuse from earlier.

He’s just loud enough that Clarke, moving to sit next to Octavia, hears and answers for Finn, “Yeah, we saw some interesting things.”

Bellamy just laughs at this, and Finn shoves him off the log he’d been sitting on.


	13. Gratitude (Ensemble)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finn, Bellamy and the Ark save The 100, They all finally reunite.

Clarke hugs her mother as soon as she sees her. Words and phrases like “I’m sorry” and “I forgive you” are said, but neither is paying much attention.

Bellamy helps Raven as they walk; she refuses to be carried, but she’s still healing and cannot walk on her own.

Finn smiles when Clarke walks over to him, Bellamy, and Raven. “Thanks for finding us,” she whispers to the two boys as she sits beside Finn.

"Yeah," Raven echos, "thanks."


	14. Leadership (Kane/Abby)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kane/Abby +"Your Majesty"

Perhaps it is simply because Kane and Abby were so much more prepared for the reality of coming to Earth that they adjust the quickest. Abby steps right into the position of healer and leader, and Kane stays near her as she checks over those injured in the landing.

Abby is the one to make the decision to search out the cause of the smoke in the distance and Kane backs her, despite any misgivings he may have.

"We’re going to need three or four other people to come with us. I want you to find volunteers; the others can stay to care for the injured and set up a perimeter."

Kane smiles, “Yes, your majesty,” he remarks as he walks away, leaving no time for her to respond.


	15. Vengence (Bellamy/Murphy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy kills Monty for shooting Raven. He doesn't make it painless.
> 
> (Violence Warning)

Bellamy and Finn run into Murphy long before they run into anyone else. Finn flippantly remarks on how strange it is that Murphy's even still alive at all, given how easily they picked up his trail.

And, perhaps things would have gone down differently if the 100 were still there with him, if he was still the leader of many instead of the leader of one (which he's pretty sure Finn would contest to anyway). And, perhaps he wouldn't be punching Murphy even as his victim chokes on his own blood if Clarke were there to yell at him.

But, really, Bellamy's sure it would have always come to this; because Murphy shot Raven and Bellamy still doesn't know if she's _dead,_ and that _eats_ at him.

So, perhaps Raven's dead and Murphy deserves to pay for that injustice, but Bellamy just prays as he looks down at Murphy's now still body, that she's alive somewhere and he'll be able to tell her that Murphy didn't get away with it.


	16. First (Kane/Abby)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abby recalls memories of her and Kane while in the airlock chamber.

When she's standing in the airlock chamber, in those moments before Jaha appears, she realizes she isn't scared of death...she's just sad. Her eyes lock with Kane's and she searches for something she used to remember.

It feels like it's been so long since those days when they were children, and she wonders if he still remember sitting next to he in Earth Skills, making snide comments about their teacher. If he still remembers how she used to sit in the back of the room when his mother talked as he watered the tree.

She searches his eyes for something, some spark that would tell her if he still remembers giving her her first kiss as they stood overlooking Earth. And when she sees it, she wonders if it matters, if he cares.


	17. Flicker (Kane/Abby)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> For a moment, Abby wants Kane to kiss her.

There’s a moment when they’re standing together, looking out at the wonders of Earth for the first time, just this tiny flicker of…something.

Abby catches his eyes and she can’t help but mirror the happiness she sees reflecting in them with a smile. And then he laughs. It’s such a simple moment of pure joy that they made it, that, just for a moment, it’s just the two of them.

And, later, she’ll wonder where the hell the notion came from, but there’s a part of her that she just wants to whisper, “ _kiss me_ ” because she can’t imagine what else but a kiss could make the moment more perfect.

But then the moment passes, and she’ll reflect upon it sometimes, wondering what could have been, had they seized that moment as she envisioned.


	18. Left (Clarke/Murphy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Murphy reflects on Clarke.

He remembers that it is her fault. He wouldn't have been hanged for a crime he didn't commit if she hadn't accused him of the crime he didn't commit.

Yet he remembers the look of horror on her face as they were stringing him up. And sometimes in his nightmares, as he struggles to breathe, it's her voice he hears protesting, screaming for them to stop it.

And, later, after he's been tortured by the grounders, she lets him back into camp to heal him--even if she is threatening to kill him if he doesn't leave later.

And perhaps it is those acts of regret and kindness that save her.


	19. Scalpel (Abby/Marcus)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I need you."

Abby hasn’t stepped foot inside Medical in three days. So much has happened since they were released from ALIE’s control. They have had to face all the things they’ve done–all the bodies left in their wake of destruction. The war has halted, but it may be far from over.

Marcus gets shot accidentally by one of their own–another ALIE victim who was struggling to deal with what has happened–and Abby doesn’t hesitate to get to Medical.

“Let me through, Jackson,” she commands when he stands between her and Marcus. He’s taken over in her absence.

“It’s not that bad, Abby,” he says calmly. “Missed all the major arteries; we’ve just to extract the bullet, I can do it on my own if you want me to.”

She shakes her head and he lets her pass.

Marcus is sitting up, wincing in pain and pressing some gauze to his stomach, but otherwise fine. “You ready for this?” he asks.

Abby takes a deep breath. “Worse is coming, right?” she says, caressing his cheek.

She turns to the table of instruments and sees the scalpel. Her hands shake.

“Hey,” Marcus whispers, breathing heavily. “I need you to be strong right now.”

His hand covers her own and guides it over to the scalpel. Abby’s trembling hand closes around the instrument and she sighs in relief. He gives her strength, and suddenly, it doesn’t feel like an awful instrument used to inflict pain. “I should be saying that to you,” she says. 


	20. Afterlife (Clarke, Clarke/Lexa)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clarke doesn't make it. This is the after.

At first, there was a moment of panic, and a sense of loss. There was so much she had yet to do, and so many people she was leaving behind. But there was also peace, and the last thing she could feel was her mother’s lips on her forehead.

And then she sees her dad waiting for her. She hugs him as hard as she can and revels in the fact that he hugs her back. “I’m sorry,” she says, but she’s not sure what she’s apologizing for. Not saving the Ark, not saving enough of their people afterwards, not living. Perhaps she’s sorry for all of it.

Wells and Finn appear soon afterwards, and Clarke isn’t sure if she should be sad or happy. She couldn’t say she believed in an afterlife of any kind when she was alive, and she is just so happy to see them all again.

Eventually, she is able to accept her choices and forgive herself for her failings. She was only one girl, and she did what she could with what she had. Finn doesn’t blame her for his death, or all that led up to it, and her dad and Wells understand all she’s done.

It’s at this point that she looks around. Someone’s missing.

“No,” she hears from behind her as a hand rests on her shoulder. “I’m right here.”

Clarke smiles.


	21. Elevator (Bellamy/Murphy)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy and Murphy stuck in an elevator. (Modern AU)

It’s awkward. That’s all there is to it.

Bellamy’s done a lot of reading in his twenty-six years of life, but never has he come across anything that can help him with this situation.

The silence stretches between them, each second seems like hours in the stale air.

Usually, in these situations, the two stuck in an elevator just end up making out or something until they're rescued.

Bellamy doesn't see that happening.

What is he supposed to say, exactly? “Hi, it’s nice to see you again,” followed up with a side of “You’re a great fuck, but next time, please don’t pull a knife on me and steal my laptop afterwards.”

Yeah, fuck no. Silence it is.

**Author's Note:**

> Series title is from "In Our Bedroom After The War" by Stars.  
> Fic title is from "Last Night On Earth" by Jessi Malay.


End file.
